is there anybody I can talk to???

Hey, you're ever so welcome for the spam!! You deserve every like...Oh, and thanks. It's much appreciated!! 😘😘

idk who cares about my issues but I really need help

please give your advice on what I should do:

ok so ever this summer I liked this boy named Kevin (horrible name, great guy and looks 😉) and he said yes so we went out for 1 day and then I broke up with him because it just didn't feel right, idk if it was too awk or I was just infatuated or I just don't know so I told him that I wasn't allowed to date and he was like oh ok and then we've texted a lot and he said he liked my friend at one point and he told her but idk if hats true because she said it's not true anymore and I not sure if he still like me now and we're going to meet up sometime. well that's not the big problem. ok so go back 3 years to 6th grade. I liked this boy named Zakk and I asked him out and I got rejected. 3 years later guess who I like now. anyway he liked my other friend Natalie beat the end of the school year and she didn't like him so when he asked her out she just sorta dragged him along and went to the 8th grade dance with him and stuff (that's when I started to be infatuated with Kevin, he asked me to slow dance and I thought he meant just as a friend cuz I thought he was still getting over someone, and then my bestie (the one he "likes") texts him a lot and told me that he liked me so I asked him out bla bla bla. so back to Zakk and Natalie, she finally broke up with him and u don't think it was ever a good idea for her to date him because he was miserable the whole time. so idk who he lies now but now that I'm starting to text with him and Kevin a lot now I'm realizing that maybe the whole infatuation with Kevin was just to make Zakk jealous and that it was my plan the whole time, well that's what part of me wants to believe... I'm not sure anymore...

sorry it's so long