I just wanted to let you know I'm so thankful for your friendship. You've meant the world to me, never forget that. ❤️ I want to apologize for all my mistakes. As well as the one I'm quite obviously making now. I love you, Ivory. Oh, and sorry.... four years in advance.... Bye, Ivory. Love you ❤️

wait Chris what?! what're you doing what're you talking about?

Chris what're you talking about what's going on

HANNAH CHRISTINE ANSWER ME NOW

why? It's all going to be over soon. Half the pills are already gone. It's alright, Ivory. The blood looks pretty anyway.

DO NOT CHRUS.

CHRIS

iim sorrdy Ivory

Dam. Stopped. Don't know if I'll wake upblater tho

dear god, so tired.

can't think straight

answer me

I need to talk to you

IVORY ANSWER ME I NEED TO TALK TO YOU

I JUST DRANK AN ENTIRE CUP

OF SALT

WATER

TO STAY AWAKE FOR YOU, NOW ANSWER ME

I'm literally crying right now please answer

Ivory, please I swear to god if you don't answer me I'm literally going to start screaming

Chris oh my god my f**king dad deleted PC omg I'm so sorry Chris I swear to god I wasn't ignoring you. what is it? why did you try it again? why did you stay awake for me?

CHRIS PLEASE ANSWER WHY DID YOU STAY AWAKE FOR ME? WHY DID YOU TRY IT AGAIN? WHY DID YOU STAY AWAKE FOR ME OUT OF EVERYONE ELSE WHO LOVES YOU?😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Chris! I'm okay I didn't cut or try to kill Myself I'm fine!!!!! my stupid a** dad deleted PC off my phone please answer 😭😭😭

holy Phoenix ashes Ivory, that was starting to feel very familiar

what was???

I don't know I don't know I don't know.

what was starting to feel familiar?!?

You're the only one who can help me focus!

ok help you focus on what?

Good lord Ivory, I'm only alive because of you

Chris please answer my questions above..

how? why??

Chris how are you alive because of ME

Kay I think this was question one- It was familiar because the night Sam died I had attempted again. She thought I was going to and she ended up doing it. She stopped answering me and eventually deleted her account. The next morning they told me she was dead.

okay...but, what about the questions I asked when you wouldn't answer me at first?

The next answerable question- You're the only one who can keep my grip on reality.

okay and last question- why did you try it again?😭

I don't remember... I think it started with a panic attack, but I can't remember exactly. I still feel sick...

Chris just calm down okay? breathe for a sec. put in your headphones and blast Fall Out Boy

M'kay

Is it helping?

yeah.

your boyfriend texted you

I know❤️ but I'm talking to you right now

...thank you ❤️

you're welcome. I love you Chris. please wake up tomorrow

oh god, I wasn't entirely sane when I was chatting earlier was I?

And I will

when?

when I couldn't answer you?

Yeah, I mean look at my spelling and why the f would I say that about that dream

when I couldn't answer you no not really..but trust me I get really insane in a bad way a lot

wait the dream was real?

Eh. I miss you

I miss you too

can you tell me the dream? you don't have to if you don't want to though

It was kind of intense. I remember something about standing on a ledge. Sam was at the bottom, telling me to come down. But you were standing behind me begging me not to jump. I think you were trapped or something because you couldn't get to me. I wanted to be with both of you. For some reason I just fell on the ground and started screaming. Thats when I woke up.

oh wow. how did you know what I sounded like? like, what did my voice sound like?

I don't know really. I can't remember the details

I remember you sounded really scared

I would sound completely terrified. I know that for a fact

ily chris❤️ although we've never met I miss you so muchhhhhhhh

Ily 2. I miss you so much. Only four more years though, if you still want to go.

Chris I would still wanna do it even if you didn't want to. I would find you and take you to Cali😂❤️😊 so really you can't back out❤️

what song are you listening to?

❤️❤️ Uma Thurman

I love that songgggg

me too!!!

f**k.

What??

I can't find my earbuds and my dad is asleep and if I make any noise I'll be yelled at and grounded.

ugh

yes I found em

YAY

ARGH

what??

F***

I have to go

dam. night Chris ily❤️❤️

Ily. Idk when I'll be on again but don't get worried. If you can get twitter I'll try and talk to you on there.

okay thx

night

night

NO!!

what????

I'm crying so hard, I don't know what to do....

It was all I had left...

Chris what?!? why are you crying?!

Chris what're you talking about😭

My mom deleted PC off my phone along with all my collected images....

Sam's last note to me was in there, and now I can't get it back..... 😭😭😭

no. she knows..

she knows about me. and maybe our convo...........no no no no no no no

No she doesn't.... I made a point of logging out every time I got off.... She thinks I USED to have an account but I told her I deleted it

how did your mom get your phone to delete it? did she read our convo about our plans in four years? omg Chris I'm so scared

oh ok

thanks god

She didn't Ivory, she doesn't know anything

I might be able to find Sam's note. remember you sent it to me..I could maybe find it

But I lost all I had left of Sam😖😭

Ok

CHRIS I FOUND IT!

I found her last note to you!!

do you want me to give you it on one of your collages?

ok I gave it to you

OH GOD THANK YOU SO MUCH

😘😘😘😘

you're welcome!

I have a confession to make

what Is it?

So, this trip when I'm eighteen? I originally planned it with one of my friends. She backed out a few months ago. THIS IS NOT THE REASON I CHOSE YOU. I hated the thought of going alone, so I wasn't going to go. When you said you wanted to start over, I suddenly thought about it again. I just wanted to let you know, unless you back out, you're going with me. She isn't. Ok? So, she may get kind of angry, and direct it at you, but ignore it ok? I just wanted to let you know all of this now, so if you ever meet her you don't feel like a back up friend. Because you aren't.

okay❤️ thanks Chris. and I won't back out. trust me. and if I do for some stupid reason, take me anyway. I'll do the same for you if you back out for some reason. it's okay thanks for letting me know😊

Ok. ☺️ So. Have you visited other states

yeah. I've been to Wisconsin and Missouri. I'm going to New York next year with my mom and Carson then when I get a passport I'm going to Canada. wbu?

I've visited a lot of states. I go to Ohio every weekend and We've driven to Florida and Virginia and Washington D.C. I've never been in the upper peninsula of Michigan so we're going up there. Also, I was planning on heading up to NY some time. The greatest thing about this, is that we can drive wherever we want for ever how long we want to. We're going to be free.

I can't wait. we won't have any worries or cares in the world

Nope!! Except money, but we'll get it somehow. Also, I have to go now, but I want you to write down every place in the US you've ever dreamed of going. Any state you really want to visit, any landmark or museum or store or whatever. Make a list, and I'll look up where it's at. Eventually I'll create a rough plan of where everything is and the best way to get to it. Bye Ivory! TTYL!!

okay! totally! ily Chris! bye!