Can’t really believe I’m back with T but things are going well I guess Feel like my life is on hold.. I want to go to school for music production but cos of his work I can’t. We need two cars. Why did I marry into the military… never do it guys. And get out of toxic relationships before you’re enmeshed like me. How can I love a śéxûàl àbûśér even if it’s stopped now… I don’t know. My bestie Astral and my family keeping me sane. just built a rememberance altar for my mammaw for upcoming Samhain.

also back to Benadryl àbûśé instead of cûttîñg, so I haven’t really stopped anything but I’m almost 60 days cut clean.

still struggling with ED and weight and stuff but wanting to start doing lifting

10 year anniversary of my cousin dying a couple days back and I feel so stunted like I’m still 13.

I know I am stunted probably at 19… when trauma hits with a traumatic marriage and you lose opportunities cos of military everything moves except you. Idk sorry this is depressing

I can’t wait to be my own person again

I was wondering if anyone from the old pc ever looked at this anymore! that aside, I’m so sad for you:( that’s good you’re not çûttïñg but it makes me sad you’re still shing. I understand it/see why though. I always hope for the best for you and I hope things get better and life starts moving for you again:)

I see what you mean by stunted at a specific age. I think I’ve been feeling something similar, but not due to trauma. for a long time I’ve felt like I’m stuck at like 16 or 17 but I think it’s because of the pandemic. i think it also might have to do with how I look? everyone says I don’t look 20 and I look 17 or 18; and also maybe because I haven’t moved out? like I feel like I’ve just been doing the same thing forever, and I think I have. I live at home and go to school. I think once I get my bachelors and move out some of that stuck feeling will go away but we’ll see 🤷🏼‍♀️

I’m happy for you that you’re finding interests like religion and maybe weight lifting! that sounds good! but that sucks that you can’t go to school rn:( hopefully one day soon! :) 🩷🩷

OH MY GOD HI!

I’m glad you’re 60 days clean from cutting that’s awesome! it’s really nice to see an update from you, I think about people from this app sometimes and always wonder how they’re doing.

Im glad you’re doing better and that your bestie and her family are keeping you sane