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I've experienced something extremely similar to this before, and I really really admire how you're approaching it. You're very wise.
Oh. So you're having those times too. You know, the same happened to me before. I realised that it's better living a short life with happiness than ab infinite life with sadness and depression. 😪💕 It's super difficult to get those thoughts away but please stay strong. 🎶
to fear death is to fear living, and to fear living is to go on dying ✨ there is a period at the end of all good sentences and a conclusion of the end of all beautiful stories. after you've put the ornaments on a Christmas tree, you place a single star or angel on top, a reminder that all paths will lead to a single place. i like to think of death as one thing that all life has in common, a library of stories some finished some abandoned. though it is reasonable to fear an abandoned story, i also think the best stories are the ones that leave you to wondering.